Malcolm in the Middle Cold Openings

This page lists all the cold intros from each episodes of Malcolm in the Middle.

Season 1

  1. No opening.
  2. Lois tries to find out what Reese and Malcolm have done wrong.
  3. The family have a pleasant meal together.
  4. The boys host a funeral for 'Jumpy Number 9'.
  5. Lois tries to get the boys to watch something wholesome.
  6. The family attempt to take a group picture.
  7. Lois wakes up Malcolm, Dewey, and Reese.
  8. Lois and Hal try to avoid getting up to see what commotion the boys are causing.
  9. Hal wants some free time to do a crossword.
  10. Dewey and Malcolm get Reese in trouble.
  11. Malcolm has to read Romeo and Juliet in class.
  12. Malcolm's class has recess inside.
  13. The boys divide up fries equally.
  14. The boys find change for an arcade game.
  15. Reese thinks he has wet the bed.
  16. Hal gets one of the kids to take the blame for him.

Season 2

  1. No opening.
  2. Reese and Malcolm participate in an expired food eating contest.
  3. The boys scam an elderly lady.
  4. Malcolm and Reese play baseball in the house.
  5. Hal can't sleep and has a feeling he has forgot something - Dewey.
  6. Reese decries his life, so Malcolm upsets Dewey to make him feel better.
  7. Hal spends the night watching Mexican soap operas.
  8. Hal and Lois try to work out how to share three eclairs between five.
  9. Hal and Lois plan the evening alone together.
  10. Reese and Malcolm have plans for Dewey and some bubble wrap.
  11. Malcolm and Hal play chess.
  12. Malcolm makes breakfast anticipating Reese stealing it.
  13. Reese changes his report card.
  14. Dewey has had a visit from the tooth fairy.
  15. Hal is making pancakes for the kids.
  16. Malcolm and Reese fight over seconds at the dinner table.
  17. Hal attempts to fix a leak.
  18. Dewey has had a bad dream.
  19. Hal sneaks a cigar.
  20. The men of the family contemplate life.
  21. Lois plans a relaxing bath.
  22. Lois finds a Christmas present leftover for Hal.
  23. Malcolm and Reese set Hal's alarm clock forward a couple of hours.
  24. The boys partake in some cleaning before tumble dryer fun.
  25. Malcolm and Reese 'play' catch with Dewey.

Season 3

  1. The family is suffering in the heat of summer.
  2. Francis tries to leave his cadet academy.
  3. Reese is collecting hair from around the house.
  4. Reese is challenged to ring a door bell naked.
  5. Hal and Lois have to share a shower.
  6. Hal attempts to replace a light bulb.
  7. Reese has control of the remote control.
  8. The kids start a fire to burn incriminating documents from school.
  9. Hal has some fun in front of the bathroom mirror.
  10. The family is has to eat the weeks leftovers.
  11. Dewey is scared of a spider in the bathroom.
  12. No opening.
  13. Hal and Lois search for Dewey around the house.
  14. The kids are spending time making funny noises.
  15. Hal and Lois decide who will attend parent-teacher night.
  16. Hal and Lois put on a charade for some quiet time.
  17. Malcolm and Hal watch a documentary together.
  18. Hal is left without any of the quilt in bed.
  19. Francis is cleaning out the garbage disposal.
  20. Hal finds some of his prized possessions damaged and buried in the garden.
  21. Dewey is having a tea party.
  22. Malcolm attempts to explain acceleration and velocity.

Season 4

  1. Malcolm and Reese play ball in the house.
  2. Francis tries to start paying his mum and dad back.
  3. Hal attempts to tidy the garage.
  4. Lois plays mind-games to get Reese to admit things he has done wrong.
  5. Lois cooks dinner but drops it.
  6. Hal and Lois finds they have been watching a video tape.
  7. Reese finds that he has grown taller.
  8. Hal tries to find the source of a beep during the night.
  9. Malcolm finds that Reese has never read Peanuts.
  10. Lois discusses her pregnancy at the dinner table.
  11. Malcolm and Reese are locked out of the house.
  12. Hal and Malcolm play a video game.
  13. Reese and his girlfriend share their homework.
  14. Hal finds that the boys forgot to return a video rental.
  15. Reese believes that aliens have landed in the street.
  16. The boys play a game while Hal is asleep.
  17. Hal tries to patch up his cut finger.
  18. Hal attempts to eat dinner without using his hands.
  19. Malcolm makes up a fake world record which Reese attempts to beat.
  20. Dewey has to avoid getting in trouble for breaking something.
  21. No opening.
  22. The family has to deal with a midnight accident by the baby.

Season 5

  1. Hal and Lois reveal the sex of new baby Jamie.
  2. Lois gets pictures of baby Jamie developed.
  3. Hal has a feeling he is forgetting something when heading to the shops.
  4. Dewey upsets Lois as she starts cutting Reese's hair.
  5. Hal plans a romantic night which stirs memories for the kids.
  6. Lois makes the mistake of cleaning the rug.
  7. Hal and Lois wrap Christmas presents.
  8. Reese and Dewey argue over who gets to change Jamie next.
  9. Dewey tries to attract some attention.
  10. Reese tries to be better at something than Malcolm.
  11. Jamie hits Hal on the head with a golf ball.
  12. Hal gets drunk.
  13. Hal brings home the wrong baby from the park.
  14. Dewey and Reese break a window.
  15. Dewey decides on his birthday present.
  16. Lois suggests the family start eating healthily.
  17. Reese takes to burning ants with a magnifying glass.
  18. Francis helps to blow up a dam.
  19. Someone has broken Lois' antique music box.
  20. Francis deals with a strange animal relationship.
  21. Jamie imagines the family a particular way.
  22. No opening.

Season 6

  1. Hal talks about the current goings on in the family.
  2. Hal is searching for his glasses.
  3. Reese attempts to play a trick on Dewey.
  4. Lois wants to give some ice cream to Jamie.
  5. Dewey discovers music.
  6. Reese damages a painting.
  7. Hal is playing Scrabble with Lois.
  8. Hal tries to make a confession at work.
  9. While playing with Jamie, Hal finds the car keys.
  10. Jamie is discovered to be a genius.
  11. Hal has baby-proofed the kitchen.
  12. Hal and Lois spend the evening looking through family x-rays.
  13. Lois has made a suspicious dinner.
  14. Reese attempts to flush the toilet while Lois is in the shower.
  15. Reese prepares his nose for the bathroom.
  16. Reese isn't feeling very well.
  17. Reese and Dewey watch a film together.
  18. Reese tries to hide evidence of his suspension from school.
  19. The boys fight over which animals can beat each other.
  20. Lois finds a risqué magazine in the boys room.
  21. Lois and Reese watch a soap opera.
  22. Hal and Malcolm do some DIY.

Season 7

  1. Lois takes to hiding pills in the kids cookies.
  2. Reese is challenged to see whether he can get brain freeze.
  3. Lois spends all day in the car listening to a taped drama.
  4. Dewey scams Malcolm and Reese for taking the blame.
  5. Reese tries to take a candy bar from Jamie.
  6. Reese tries to figure out if Malcolm has shook his can of soda.
  7. Dewey and Malcolm strap sleeping Reese to a car.
  8. Hal worries when he finds Jamie with a plastic bag.
  9. Reese gets caught trying to sneak out of the house.
  10. The family tries to squeeze every last drop of the toothpaste.
  11. Hal, Malcolm and Reese avoid doing the dishes.
  12. The family finds they are having liver and beans for dinner.
  13. Reese steps in something on the way home.
  14. Hal and Reese embark on finding the source of a smell in the fridge.
  15. Reese takes to poking Dewey.
  16. Lois plays hand-me-down with a denim jacket.
  17. Hal invites a friend round to the house.
  18. Dewey and Reese compete to see who can hold a light bulb on their tongue the longest.
  19. Reese teaches Jamie how to tie his shoelaces.
  20. Dewey sneaks a mouse in the house.
  21. Reese has a plan to pass his exams.
  22. Hal attempts to fix the television.